ritual.

I've been reflecting on my life recently - thinking about what is missing and what there is too much of. Giving up alcohol for two weeks was amazing. I definitely want to stop drinking as much. I want to actually take a look at when I decide to drink and whether it's really necessary. I don't think I need to be 100% sober all of the time, but I think I should just be more critical about my drinking. I used to think that I should drink when I'm out of the house and never drink alone at home, but I'm starting to rethink that. I should have a drink when I feel like it and I should refrain from drinking when I don't feel like it. Those things aren't necessarily contingent on being social. Also, I sleep so much better and feel less sluggish without the alcohol, so just focusing on that should help me decrease my intake.

Beyond that, I need some order to my life. I think that when I started working in events, I gained a lot of excitement and spontaneity in my career, but also gained a lot of stress and lost my sense of order. I stopped working down the peninsula and instead I work in SF, where I can come and go as I please and I take Uber or public transportation to work. I travel at random intervals and I never really know what my workload will be like because events sometimes just spring up. While I enjoy it immensely, I learned in college that order and routine are good for me (I'm a Virgo... in so many ways). I need to start getting on some kind of schedule. It doesn't have to be rigid, but it does need to exist. I think it will just help me be more productive and happy.

One of the things I miss the most were my See No One Sundays. I used to reserve Sunday as a day strictly for me, back when I lived in SF in 2007-2008. It was nice. I usually just took the N down to the Starbucks by AT&T Park and read and wrote for hours. I'd do a little walking if it was nice outside, but really it was just good to clear my head and be free of social obligation to just recharge. It felt like a nice way to end the weekend and get my week started. While I know it's highly unlikely that I can do that every Sunday, I think I want to start reinstating that day at least once a month. So tomorrow, I'm going full hermit mode. Do not disturb.