weird mood.

I know I need to blog about Italy, but getting all the photos together and writing everything out sounds like work. I'm going to table that for the weekend, when I have some time to relax. Catching up after a week away from work is kind of insane! I also just feel so strange. I have this weird pit in my stomach that I can't explain. I feel that way sometimes when people visit and they leave or when a big change is about to happen. I'm not really sure what big change is happening and maybe I'm feeling this way because I'm leaving New York on Monday, but I just feel kind of oddly melancholy. I slept until 10am today, which is SO not like me. I normally like to get up early and putter around the house.

I miss vacation. I know I take a lot of them (Holla - 7 years at my company gets me 5 weeks off and I have a shit ton of comp time!), but I miss relaxing. Most of the time when I go away domestically, I check email, I respond to things, and I'm active with work. Last week, I barely checked anything at all and certainly didn't reply to anything that wasn't personal or related to my potential job transfer. It was nice.

Speaking of job transfer, I have my final two interviews next Wednesday. SO freaking nervous. Then, if I pass that hurdle, I have to meet with the person who would be my director, who I actually already know and have worked with before. My interviews so far have been good and I'm still excited about the role. I do have some nervousness around it, though. I'm scared to go back to working in Mountain View. The commute is terrible. Although, it can be argued that I spend 90 min every day on a city bus to get to a job that is only 4 miles away. The plus side of Mountain View is that the campus is amazing, there's a lot down there, and I'd get to get out of the crummy SF weather. However, going to Giants games during the week would be a lot more of a challenge =)

I think I'm feeling odd because I know that a major lifestyle change is going to happen. This potential career change is going to be very different for me. That jetsetting travel shit I do will be gone. Although, since I've developed a taste for travel, I'm really hoping it just motivates me to take more personal trips. One thing I am kind of happy about is that my job will use some different parts of my brain. I love events and they are SO DAMN DIFFICULT. Seriously, I have a tremendous amount of respect for everyone in the industry and the levels of stress that we deal with, but when you're in the moment freaking out about a goddamn piece of swag, you can't help but think WHAT IS MY LIFE?! If I got this new role, it would be working with the team that does machine learning and search and geo engineering. That shit is exciting! Also, I'd get to write. I love to write. The written word and language has always excited me. As a kid, I would read these weird books about etymology, and even now, I love finding the perfect word or turn of phrase to describe something. Anyway. Change is a'comin. I better prepare myself.

In the meantime, this weekend is all about Long Island things - mani/pedi, threading, BEACH, movies, and being outside in the warm night air. Cannot wait.